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The silent treatment

We had a connection, we had a bond, then you suddenly go cold on me. Why do something that would hurt me? Sounds familiar? 

Being ghosted sucks for sure. It becomes even frustrating when you don’t know exactly you did wrong but you must never lose your cool. Easier said than done!

No matter how devastating it feels, never start apologizing or beg them for attention. Do this and you will be feeding the beast!

The silent treatment is widely regarded as a form of emotional manipulation, but here are some Nim Notty ways of getting through: 

• Get away from the ‘energy’ 

Sometimes we feel anxious, we panic, or get filled with rage. At this point, you are ‘flooded’. Your body is filled with adrenaline. This happens when the feeling can’t be integrated in a moment. Go to someplace you like and treat yourself to a drink or meal you love.  

• Love the Green

Pay attention to the wind, birds, and trees. Get into it. This will really calm all your negative thoughts. 

• Change the POV

Look at the situation from the other person’s Point Of View. Review what happened right before the silent treatment. 

Also Read: How to Foster Friendship with Your Boyfriend’s Friends 

• Use ‘I’ statements 

This is a practical way of sharing your thoughts and feelings without blaming the other person. Always lead by example. Show kindness, humility, and self-control. 

• Offer solutions 

Make a plan on how to talk to each other when things get heated up and how to avoid the silent treatment 

• Set personal boundaries 

First, think about how you would like to be treated in a relationship. Share the expectations with your partner 

• Space to think

By pulling away your partner may not necessarily be aware that it hurts you. Probably they are trying to nurse their own wounds. Give each other time to reflect. Agreeing on the silence will allow the both of you to gain some objectivity 

• Perform Self-care 

Being on the receiving end of the silent treatment doesn’t feel good. Spend some time doing things that relax you and make you smile. Get a massage, take a bubble bath, exercise or visit a nearby park. 

Also Read: How to catch your cheating spouse

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2023