Beware of The Enemy Within!
Come on! Not all your bosom friends are entitled to every detail about your soul-tie relationship. There is a saying that goes, “A secret’s worth depends on the people from whom it must be kept.” Not everyone close to you is a keeper of secrets. The very close friends we divulge the secrets of our romantic problems and joy are the same ones who let them out. Your friends should motivate and inspire you. Your circle should be well rounded and supportive. Keep it tight. Quality over quantity.
There are two types of secrets, the one you don’t want to dare let out, and the one you keep in. When you involve few, trusted and qualified people in matters relationship, you minimize rumours. Rumours distort your conscious approach to issues because you are both prone to unnecessary external influence.
Keep Familiarity At Bay
The danger with letting people know your relationship problems and success is that it creates too much familiarity. You must be aware that familiarity breeds contempt. It is also true that mystery attracts respect, and too much talking sheds our allure. Mystery confines the allure which in turn keeps one from being judged unfairly. Remember that people will always question the good things they hear about you but will believe everything bad without a second thought.
Your relationship is like a book and if the cover is anything to go by, it must be that which many readers will be completely unable to judge. Keeping relationship problems under wraps allows partners to surmount them from a realistic and conscious point of view. A relationship involves two from the onset and then stretches a little bit to include those whose input in terms of advice matters a great deal. However, people don’t limit friendship to only include those who give relationship advice. There are those friends who are good at other things like business ideas but bad in aspects related to romantic relationships.
If some of your friends whose contribution in your relationship is not needed, suspect that there is a problem between you and your partner, be intelligent enough to downplay it. Perhaps the best way to diffuse scrutiny from snoopy friends is by telling them that every couple has a problem to deal with and you are no exception. Assume you are the rule, not the exception. It is liberating, though it is not an easy concept. Joshua Marine once said that, “Challenges are what make life interesting and overcoming them is what makes life meaningful.
Secrets To Be Kept, Do Not Only Concern Your Problems
One may ask which things are best kept secret or only told to a few trusted friends. There are quite a number of things which do not necessarily have to be problems, some are actually good things. Even in times of joy and merry, you should keep them secret. Sometimes your happiness can be short-lived courtesy of jealous friends. Be careful what you tell people, for a friend today could be an enemy tomorrow. Some people close to us, wallow in a miasma of double-mindedness. One side of their coin pretends to be loving while the other side harbours secret hate. This is the perfect definition of frenemity. Serpent has no venom like a jealous and phoney friend. Fake friends are like shadows, they follow you in the sun and forsake you in the dark.
The greatest enemies of success and happiness are negative emotions of all kinds. Negative feelings and energy from the surroundings eat away from your gains. Some people will say that is being superstitious. All men, however highly educated, retain some superstitious inklings. Aren’t we occasionally insecure, and isn’t clamour for security a product of fear of the unknown, some of which is superstitious in nature? Remember that success makes enemies of those who would have never been true friends. Now Let’s Look At Some of The Bad and Good Things You Should Keep Secret
# 1 Your Secret Affairs
As the adage goes, “The best love affairs are those that we never had”. Let the answer remain, you have never had an affair outside of your relationship. That is going to be sweet. The moment you reveal it, however sweet it was, will turn out sour. One of your friends could end up telling other people about it, and in no time, the news will eventually reach your partner.
# 2 Bedroom Matters
Bedroom matters range from sex to the way your partner sleeps whether they snore or not. Don’t tell them how sweet your partner is, or how boring they are in bed. What happens when you describe your partner’s sexual behaviour taste, is it creates curiosity among some your fake friends and they will aspire to adduce and deduce what you have told them. Curiosity is the essence of human existence and exploration has been part of humankind for a long time.
You told your friend how sweet your partner is in bed. That is why you have just discovered that they have an affair with your friend. The rat from your neighbour’s house is now feeding on your sumptuous meal because you cooked it well and left it uncovered. The aroma is irresistible.
It is not a good show also if you tell your friends how your partner snores or farts while in bed. This will make your friends look down upon your partner and may also cause a lot of anxiety and discomfort whenever you meet.
# 3 Petty or Trivial Fights
There are fights which should be kept secret, such as arguments over money, responsibilities and such like. Relationships include: fights, jealousy, arguments, faith, tears, disagreement, but a true all through that with love. You are not an isolated case, so keeping some of these imperfections out of your friends’ reach will do more good than harm. Reporting every single detail of your relationship fights raises a false and unnecessary alarm.
# 4 Your Investment Plans
In the words of Warren Buffet, “I will tell you how to become rich. Close the doors. Be fearful when others are greedy. Be greedy when others are fearful.” Business ideas are best implemented in secrecy. When you tell others your dreams, they might scatter it by punching holes in it. Before you know it, you will have developed divergent views, causing procrastination or total abandonment.
You are not yet out of the woods, so don’t whistle. We can go on and on talking about all these. The choice of what to say out there and to whom, lies within your discretion. I hope you make adjustments in the way you disseminate relationship information to your friends.2958