Reading Time: 3 minutes

Ho Ho Ho Merry Christmas

What a day to be happy and make merry, it’s Christmas for godsake so loosen up and  be happy.

On this day millions of peeps travel for miles to be with their families and others join their friends and have fun as they celebrate their bond.

Not everyone is lucky though to have family and friends over on this special day. Some people will be working on that day while others can’t travel for one reason or another. Not chilling with family and friends this Christmas season is no reason, however, to be sad. There are a lot of people out there who would be over the moon to hang out with you on Christmas. Here are just a few.

Exotic Escorts

Escorts are the new family and they don’t come any better than exotic escorts. Smart, sexy and professional they are the next best thing after family. What’s more they won’t nag you for not doing one thing or another they simply will give you the best company money can buy.

The good news is you don’t even need to have been a good boy or girl the whole year for them to reward you. They will even spoil you better if you were naughty and a bad boy. Seriously who needs friends when escorts are available 24/7.

Animals

I know how it sounds but yes animals can actually make good company and what better day to hang out with them than one day every other animal is holed up in modern caves. Christmas is a good time to pay a visit to your local park for a quiet sightseeing experience. With people at home feasting on roasted nyama choma and drinking themselves silly the parks and animal orphanages are almost empty and if you love animals this is the best time to go hang out with them. Make an effort though to know beforehand if the park accepts foodstuff so that if they do you can do some shopping and go give them a treat for a lifetime.

Convicts

Look if you ask me we are all free criminals awaiting the date of our sentencing. Our respective sins may vary but we are all guilty of one thing or another so why the stigma?. Before they were convicted most jailbirds lived a normal life just like you and me so this Christmas season is a good time to visit convicts and remind them that while they may be locked society still needs them. You will be surprised at what sober and smart some convicts are and they will tell you all about life behind bars so that you really know what awaits you when the law catches up with you.

Elderly

Whenever people look at the elderly they see people in their sunset years living their last years in harmony. What is hidden in plain sight, however, in those wrinkles and crevices is radiant youthful  faces and ripped bodies that was once the hottest thing in town. They don’t see the wild parties that went till dawn and how they threw all caution to the wild and held orgies and fucking competitions.

This Christmas season make a point to visit a few elders and carry a few presents and a bottle you will be surprised at just how wild they used to be they will put your exploits to shame.

Some elders who lived full lives will regale you with their youth exploits and show you that life is indeed for the living. After a few drinks to soothe their dry throats some will even open up and tell you their reasons for insisting on not wearing a condom during sex.

A few with good memories will even remember that one time they unknowingly took Viagra laced soft drink and unleashed havoc.

1671