Kenyan women

Kenyan women will dump these men in 2023 

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Unfortunately, it’s an end to the simping as Kenyan Women will be dodging these guys:

Last year was a roller coaster for a couple of women who had to swallow copious amounts of character development. A couple of women were sent back to the dating scene, yaani kurudishwa Soko quick-fast. Kenyan women had to swallow the bitter pill that their ‘mister right’ had no intention of cuffing them despite sucking their dicks dry and sugaring their stinking boxers. This year, Kenyan women have decided to tow the baby girl line since it turns out that this year will be a soft year. If we have to settle for mubabaz trust me, they are within our reach. Here are ten men who we shall not date this year :

The single online 

Men who hide their women from social media because they want to “keep things private” will be forgotten in the new year. We won’t permit you to date and flirt with millions of women as we become vipenzi vitazamaji. We want you to show us off to the world if you care about retaining us!

Men who never proposed last year

Dating without a title is so tedious for women who want to be cuffed so for those who didn’t propose to us after several years of dating, count yourselves dumped. We are no longer buying the ” waiting for the right time” narrative. We all know it is a scam because you will chimba boreholes in us and go out for the tight asses. Wrinkles are written on our foreheads already and our biological clocks are ticking! So marry us fast enough or surrender our honey pots for your best friends or bosses.

Chama cha Kushuku

If you had no trust in our last year, we are leaving you behind this year. Those who hacked our phones always checked our call logs and deleted numbers in our phones should wave goodbye. We are also cutting off those men who don’t believe that we have only two ex-boyfriends and those who sulk when we leave them behind as we go to piga sherehe or vacate in Diani. You need to improve on your trust levels!

The Simpsons 

We are not doing simps in the new year dear men. If you text us once and we choose not to respond, carry on with your life. Don’t sulk and interrogate us for not picking up your calls. You don’t rely on me for your existence, I don’t carry your lungs in my handbag remember !

Men who sag trousers 

Kenyan women

Men you’d better belt up in this new year, we don’t want to see you collecting your pants on the floor. Beware that we may burn your baggy jeans so hide them properly if you must.

Mikono Gum 

Men who don’t send fare when we visit them should better start sending fare failure to which we shall look for their replacements. Kindly avoid asking for the taxi driver’s phone number so that ” ulipe direct “And dear men telling us tumia yako nitakurudishia is so 18th-century.

Salamu Brigade 

We shall kick away those who have been sending “salamu” from imaginary mothers-in-law in the year. If we didn’t get to meet your mothers over the festive season, just keep your Salamus to yourselves because your mothers probably don’t know that we exist.

Warembo Sacco 

Men with skincare routines should remain behind in 2022. We don’t want to see men with masked faces and getting into our dressing tables misplacing our vitamin C, moisturizers, and scrubs. And oooh you may scare away our babies especially when you wear the charcoal face mask. 

Read Also: 5 Signs It’s Time To Dump Her

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