The Unwritten Rules for Being a Side-chic
Why Some Women Choose to Be “Side Dishes”
The term “side-chic” refers to a woman who is romantically involved with a man who is already committed to someone else. While this situation might seem unconventional or problematic to many, some women choose this role for various reasons. Here’s a look into why some women might opt for being a side-chic :
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Emotional Fulfillment
For some women, the role of a side-chic can provide a sense of emotional satisfaction and validation. The attention and affection received from a partner, even in a secretive or limited capacity, can offer temporary happiness. This validation might be especially appealing if they feel unappreciated or undervalued in other aspects of their lives.
Desire for a Low-Commitment Relationship
Being a side-chic often comes with fewer expectations and less emotional involvement compared to a primary relationship. Some women may prefer this arrangement to avoid the complexities and pressures of a committed relationship. This setup allows them to enjoy companionship and intimacy without the demands of a full-time partnership.
Personal or Professional Constraints
Certain personal or professional situations may make a committed relationship challenging. For instance, a woman with a demanding job or a busy lifestyle might find it easier to engage in a less conventional relationship where both parties agree to limit their involvement. This arrangement can offer companionship while fitting better with their lifestyle constraints.
Exploration of New Experiences
Being a side-chic might appeal to some women as a way to explore new experiences and break away from traditional relationship norms. The excitement and secrecy of the role can be stimulating, allowing them to explore different aspects of their sexuality or relationship preferences.
Insecurity and Self-Esteem
Women with low self-esteem or past emotional wounds might accept the role of a side-chic due to a belief that they cannot secure a more conventional or committed relationship. The attention and validation from a partner, even in a limited role, can temporarily boost their self-esteem and provide a sense of worth.
Companionship and Intimacy
The role of a side dish can fulfill basic human needs for companionship and intimacy. Even if the relationship is not traditional, the connection with another person can offer comfort and support. For some women, the benefits of the relationship, such as emotional connection and physical intimacy, may outweigh the drawbacks of its secretive nature.
Lack of Alternatives
Sometimes, women might choose to be a side dish because they perceive a lack of better options. If they struggle to find a suitable partner who meets their needs for a committed relationship, they might settle for a less conventional arrangement that provides some level of connection and fulfillment.
Cultural or Social Influences
Cultural and social factors can also play a role. In certain social circles or media portrayals, being a side dish might be normalized or even glamorized. Women might feel influenced by societal expectations or popular culture, which can affect their choices and perceptions of such relationships.
Being a side-chic in a relationship is more complex than it might seem. If you choose to take on this role, there are certain strategies you should follow to maintain discretion and ensure your relationship works smoothly.
Here are important guidelines to help you succeed in such a relationship:
Maintain Confidentiality
The most crucial aspect of being a side chick is keeping the relationship secret. Do not share details with friends, family, or on social media. Your role involves staying out of the public eye, and any breach of this confidentiality could jeopardize your position. The relationship should remain private, with no visible signs or public acknowledgment. It is important to respect this boundary and let your partner handle any disclosures about the relationship.
Avoid Emotional Attachment
Developing romantic feelings for your partner can complicate the arrangement. The relationship is typically intended to be casual, without emotional strings attached. Falling in love can lead to unrealistic expectations and additional complications that the primary partner may not be prepared to address. It is essential to manage your emotions and keep the relationship as uncomplicated as possible.
Respect His Space
Understand that your partner will divide his attention between you and his primary relationship. Avoid demanding the same level of attention he gives to his main partner. It is important to stay independent and not rely on constant contact. Engage in your own activities and maintain a busy lifestyle. This helps prevent feelings of frustration or disappointment when he is occupied with his primary family or commitments.
 Adhere to Relationship Boundaries
Respect the boundaries set within the relationship. Avoid using his images or sharing personal moments on social media. He may prefer to keep his private life separate from his public life, so it is important to honor this preference. Understanding and accepting these boundaries will help maintain the privacy and integrity of the arrangement.
 Refrain from Public Displays of Affection
Publicly showcasing the relationship is not advisable. Maintaining secrecy is key to managing a side relationship effectively. Public displays of affection or acknowledgment can lead to complications or uncomfortable situations. Ensure that the relationship remains discreet and private to avoid potential issues.
Avoid Stalking His Main Partner
It’s crucial to resist the temptation to investigate his primary partner, whether through social media or other means. Even though you might be tempted to check out her profiles or learn more about her, remember that she is his committed partner. Your role is to remain in the background and maintain discretion. Engaging in such behavior can create unnecessary complications and potentially jeopardize your position. Keeping a respectful distance not only protects you from emotional stress but also maintains the secrecy of your relationship.
Understand the Risks
Being a side chick involves accepting certain risks and limitations. Understand that your relationship with him is inherently private and often comes with challenges. You may need to stay out of public view when he is with his family or friends to avoid drawing attention. This means avoiding places where you might run into his loved ones or be recognized. It’s essential to be prepared for this and accept that you will not be part of his public life. This also includes being ready to handle situations where he might need to keep you out of sight or alter plans unexpectedly.
Adapt to Changes
Flexibility is key in a side relationship. You should be ready for sudden changes in plans, such as a cancelled date or a shift in priorities. His family, work commitments, or other responsibilities may take precedence. Understand that his availability may not always align with your expectations, and handle these situations calmly. Getting upset over last-minute changes or cancellations can lead to unnecessary conflict. Instead, focus on enjoying the time you do have together and don’t take his occasional unavailability personally.
Avoid Involvement in His Main Relationship
Do not expect him to discuss his problems or issues with his primary partner. Your role is not to act as a counselor or mediator for his main relationship. Avoid asking him about his primary partner or their issues. Respect their relationship and maintain a boundary between your interactions with him and his commitments to her. If he brings up problems in his primary relationship, encourage him to address them directly with his partner. Your involvement in their issues is neither appropriate nor productive.
Don’t Expect Traditional Courtship
As a side chick, your relationship is likely to be more casual and less formal than a typical romantic relationship. This means you should not expect traditional courtship behaviors such as romantic gestures, frequent dating, or commitment. Your interactions with him will be focused on enjoying each other’s company in a less conventional manner. Avoid setting expectations for a deeper emotional connection or for behaviors typical of a primary relationship. Understanding and accepting this dynamic can help you navigate your role without disappointment.
Avoid ‘Babying’ Him
In your role as a side chick, you should not expect endearments such as “dear” or “babe.” These terms are often reserved for more committed relationships and may not be used in your situation. Adjusting your expectations and accepting the nature of your relationship can help you avoid emotional strain. By accepting that these terms might not be part of your interactions, you can focus on enjoying your time together without the added pressure of seeking affection that may not be forthcoming.
Conclusion
Navigating a relationship as a side chick requires careful attention to secrecy, emotional boundaries, and respect for established limits. By following these guidelines, you can manage the relationship more effectively while minimizing potential problems. For those in a primary relationship, understanding these dynamics can offer valuable insight into the challenges and behaviors associated with being a secondary partner.
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