Are You Wasting Time with Her?

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You would never want to picture wasting time with her; rather, you’d want her to feel cherished, appreciated, and connected with you. Time, energy, and emotions shouldn’t be wasted on someone who doesn’t care. If you have come to the point where it’s starting to make you wonder if perhaps your efforts are overlooked, it’s time to step back and have a look at your situation objectively. Here are some signs that you are wasting your time with her:

 

She’s Emotionally Unavailable

 

Actually, one of the building blocks of any happy strong relationship is emotional availability; that is, she avoids deep, heartfelt discussions, sidesteps discussing anything about feelings, or won’t commit and talks about her future plans-the alarm goes off here. If there isn’t mutual emotional involvement in the relationship, it is one-sided and not rewarding.

 

Her Actions Don’t Match Her Words

 

As the saying goes, it fits just about everything in life, including relationships. If she mouths commitment, love, and effort all the time but does not deliver through acts that prove the opposite, then that is surely one sure sign of inconsistency. She might say she cares about you, for example, and yet keeps canceling plans or does not show up when that situation is important-that’s the lack of integrity in words. Mixed signals will only confuse someone and frustrate them; they would slowly and surely ruin trust and connection.

 

You’re Always the One Initiating Contact

 

It takes two to communicate and put effort into a relationship. If, after some time, you are still always the first one to initiate a conversation, a text, or a call to meet, she doesn’t put as much effort back. Eventually, relationships require give-and-take to not emotionally drain one side of it. The mutual interest that is there between partners is important for any relationship.

 

She’s Noncommittal About the Future

 

Long-term plans are always a big part of any serious relationship. If she avoids talking about long-term goals, commitment, or what the future holds for her and you together, that is reason enough to raise an eyebrow. If she dodges talks over the future, it could be a hint that she does not see one with you. A partner who takes the relationship seriously will include you in his future plans and dreams.

 

You feel unappreciated.

 

Appreciation means a lot in any kind of relationship. When the good things you do for someone-support, help, love-are appreciated and/or noticed, it may make one feel less appreciated if these are not seen or recognized. Whether you have been a rock when things get tough or simply showed up for her, your efforts should not go unnoticed. Without appreciation, one might be left asking whether she values his existence in her life.

 

She Contacts You Only When She Needs Something

 

Is she calling or texting only when she needs something from you, needs emotional support, or needs help? This sort of behaviour is frquent in one-sided relationships where you get used instead of valued. Relationships should be based on mutual caring and support, not on the convenience of an individual. When it is the only time involving you in a situation where the benefit is hers, then that is already a clear indicator that she doesn’t invest in you.

 

You’re Not Part of Her Life

 

Being a part of your partner’s life is one sign of serious intention. A woman who doesn’t incorporate you into major events, let alone plan her future with you in mind and introduce you to friends and family, has got several warning bells ringing. A person who means to make you an integral part of their life will not delay sharing his time with you in all ways possible.

 

You feel worthless all the time.

 

This is supposed to be the one place where you are uplifted and built up. If being with her makes you feel like questioning your value, your attractiveness, or your self-worth, well, that is a pretty good sign this relationship is taking a dent in your confidence. A good partner should make you feel secure and appreciated, not inferior or unsure of yourself.

 

You’re holding onto the potential, not reality.

 

It’s easy to fall prey to the pursuit of who she could be. If you frequently catch your breath with every thought that she will change, grow, or finally blossom into what you want, you are probably not facing the fact. In many instances, it actually results in disappointments after a person has kept on waiting for something that he needs the partner to be. With relationships, you would need to learn to love and accept one another as you are now.

 

Not always so easily noticed, most of all when emotions become attached. But let it be so for your understanding; sometimes these truths are relevant for your advancement and happiness, because your time, energy, and emotions deserve an appreciation which has worth.

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